How I Learned To Sit In Stillness Before God

Photo by Zayceva Tatiana

I'm not naturally one to sit in silence or to be still. In fact, I come from a long line of women who were and are doers — the ones who got things done, saw the needs and met them, were on their feet working from sun up to sundown, oftentimes rushing from one task to the next.

Sitting in silence? Being still? Going slow? Those weren’t in my matriarchs’ vocabularies. There was too much to be done! In fact, my memories of many of the women in my family were of them always being on their feet working — doing something in the kitchen, tending to the needs of their households. And if they were sitting? Then most often it was to bring a sewing project to completion or to get work done on the computer.

Now, this isn’t to say they were necessarily workaholics, nor is it to say I was neglected in any way or that those very same women didn’t also take the time to color or play games with me, read to me, have me spend the night at their houses, or teach me the art of making and canning applesauce. They most certainly did, and those are by far some of the most prized memories I possess from my childhood.

But it is to say that they always had something they were doing, they were always busy with one activity or another. Their lives weren’t quiet. They didn't sit in stillness. And they oftentimes kept a pretty fast pace.

Hitting close to home.

Looking back, I knew as a child that this was the way the resourceful, hardworking women in my life operated. I distinctly remember being a teenager visiting my great-grandparents in Indiana and hearing my 90-something-year-old great-grandfather say to my mom whom he saw rushing around taking dirty dishes to the sink, “Angie, you need to slow down.”

But I never gave any thought to the fact that I might one day become the same way, a woman in need of those very same words of wisdom. In fact, if I had ever consciously given it any thought at all, I probably would have said I wouldn’t turn out that way. Growing up, I was always the type B to my mama’s type A, the one much more likely to be like my laid-back father and to go with the flow. And then…

I don't know if it was in becoming a mom and having much more on my plate than I ever did as a child myself or what, but I very quickly morphed into the wives, mothers, homemakers, and business owners who had gone before me. I became that woman, that proverbial Martha, who rushed around with my many cares and concerns of life, daily scurrying quickly from one task to the next in an effort to “get it all done.”

All the way back to 2015 (the very year my first child was born), I can trace a common thread in the notes I wrote in the margins of books I read and Bible studies I went through — the call I sensed from the Lord telling me to slow down even then.

But I’m stubborn, and apparently am only slow at one thing — heeding the voice of the Lord in my life.

What we’re missing.

Interestingly, when you look at Jesus’ words to Martha in their infamous interaction found in Luke 10:38-42, He doesn’t scold her for trying to get things done. He never says that she is wrong to do the work required for her to practice hospitality. Nor is His point ever that she should just laze around all day and squander her time. We know from elsewhere in Scripture (see especially Psalm 90:2 and Ephesians 5:16) that redeeming the time well, being good stewards of the time and life we have been given by God, is of utmost importance.

But how are we equipped to redeem the time well? How do we become wise in what that looks like and how that is to happen? We imitate Mary. 

Jesus’ words to Martha are very telling. He says to her in Luke 10:41-42, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has made the right choice, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Back up to verses 38-40, and we see what the problem was with Martha’s approach — “a woman named Martha welcomed him [Jesus] into her home. She had a sister named Mary, who also sat at the Lord’s feet and was listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by her many tasks”

The problem was not that Martha was determined to be a good hostess. The problem was that her determination had led to her becoming distracted from what was ultimately most important — sitting at the Lord’s feet and listening to Him.

If we are being honest, this same problem is evident in many of our lives today. I know it has been for me. We become so focused on the tasks — the household chores, the work projects, the never-ending to-do lists — that we forget what it even is that equips us to do those things well in the first place (and what it is that helps us know what tasks to prioritize and which tasks can be relegated to another day). Paul tells us in 2 Timothy 3:16-17 that “all Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, for rebuking, for correcting, for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.”

Did you catch that last part there? It is the Word of God that equips us for every good work. If we believe that the work we have been given by God to do — the caring for our families, tending to our jobs, ministering to others, and stewarding the gifts of our homes — is good work (and it is), then it is the Word of God which equips us for that work.

Meaning, that if we are not in the Word (and, I would say, not hearing and heeding the voice of the Spirit when He speaks to us), we are not equipped to even perform the tasks God has given us to do.

That was the mistake Martha made, and it is the very same mistake so many of us make, as well.

Getting back to basics.

So, what are we to do then? What is the answer?

What I am discovering is that the answer is to be found in living a life characterized by slowness, stillness, quiet, and contemplation. As the new year quickly approached, those words stood out to me everywhere I turned — in every blog post I stumbled across, Instagram post that came across my feed, and book I read. This is how the Holy Spirit tends to work in my life when He is trying to tell me something — He has His message appear everywhere I turn.

As I pondered the importance of this call to slowness, stillness, quiet, and contemplation, I discovered something. This call is crucial, because it is only in living a life like this that we are fully able to hear from the Spirit, sense His leading and direction, and notice and become aware of what He is doing in and through our lives.

This is crucial because God’s voice is a still, small voice, and you can’t hear a voice like that when you are living the way I did for so long — rushing from one thing to the next and always filling every moment of silence with noise and hurry and busyness instead.

The voice of God.

We discover this nature of God's voice — that of being a still, small voice — in 1 Kings as we read through Elijah's life story. First Kings 19:11-13 says,

“Suddenly, the word of the Lord came to him, and he said to him, ‘What are you doing here, Elijah?’

10 He replied, ‘I have been very zealous for the Lord God of Armies, but the Israelites have abandoned your covenant, torn down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword. I alone am left, and they are looking for me to take my life.’

11 Then he said, ‘Go out and stand on the mountain in the Lord’s presence.’

At that moment, the Lord passed by. A great and mighty wind was tearing at the mountains and was shattering cliffs before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was a voice, a soft whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave.”

It’s hard to get someone’s attention as they are running by you. You would have to raise your voice at them, and that’s not what God’s voice does.

It’s hard to get someone’s attention when they are constantly filling their ears with the voices of others through non-stop entertainment, music, podcasts,  audiobooks, or company, or when they spend no time contemplating what you say. You would have to raise your voice at them, and that is not what God’s voice does.

God’s voice is a still, small voice, one only heard when we pursue silence and stillness.

This may seem an impossible feat in your current season of life. Trust me, I get it. But I am finding that if the Lord calls us to something, He equips us well for it and enables it to happen.

So, friend, if you want to cultivate slowness and stillness in your life, if you want to pursue more quiet and contemplation, if you want to hear from God, may I assure you that it actually is possible? I encourage you to seek the Lord in prayer, asking for His wisdom and direction for how to do just that.

James 1:5 says, “Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God—who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly—and it will be given to him.” Seek the Lord, and He will happily show you the practical steps to take to make this new pursuit happen. It isn’t always easy, but it is absolutely worth it. And we are on this journey together.

May God bless you, and may He work in and through your pursuit of stillness.

“For the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel has said this, ‘In returning [to Me] and rest you shall be saved, In quietness and confident trust is your strength.’” ~Isaiah 30:15